Licence to drive
Well, i’m not going to be witty or cheeky today… [i’ve tried to be, in my past postings… if you haven’t realized… 
].. Todays story starts off like this.. Almost an year ago I applied for my driving license..
I took all the necessary steps… like joined a "learners", drove the shitty van, got verbally abused by the "instructor" everytime i did something right.. got beaten everytime I got something wrong.. All this after paying the bugger a lump sum for his "services"! 
Went to the exam, and I passed. Mind you, I did feel bad when I saw the "instructor" pass something ever so discreetly to the "examiner". It was so discreet, It was soooooo noticable… 
Anyways, I set off home happy and contended. Not that I couldn’t drive. I already had valid driving licences in 2 other countries… but if there’s one thing I understood about Sri Lanka, it is that it’s not like any other country.
Proof of the licence was a huge piece of paper, thrice in length than in width. Hey Where’s the small card? "Oh that takes time… it’ll come by post" says my "instructor" … So I end up sighing… and oh well .. this is Sri Lanka.
So month after month passes by… no card.. So after eight months I ring up the "instructor" and ask him about it. He says.. " It takes TIME!" afraid he’ll spank me over the phone, I quickly subdue my other questions and place the phone.
Now, the huge paper is nearing its expiry. (valid for only 12 months) Still no card… So I decide its time to go to the RMV.. which i dearly regret now…
Oh the procedure just to enter the gates was so … dunnno… kinda kinky…
.. But then its Sri Lanka..
I was told to go to Room 80. Spent 10 minutes trying to find the room. As usual no signboards. So there were 2 queues. People jam packed, and looking like a miniature stampede. So eni mini miini mo… and I select a queue…
Takes me 20 minutes to reach the counter… which was actually a window, with the lower glass removed. The guy takes my licence and says.. you haven’t got your details filled in…. go stand in the other counter! 
Oh the misery… So I stand, in the other counter … It takes one hour! Once reaching the counter I realized what was special about it.. There was a guy with a computer near it. He would check your details and write some reference no. on a piece of paper and then you had the glorious opportunity of having to stand again in the previous queue!
However I was spared that extra glory, as it seems that my licence was in the mail…
Forgive me for being blunt, but isn’t it the height of paradoxes to take one year to make a plastic card? In this modern day, where "nano technology" is setting in especially in Sri Lanka.. How come information crawls slower than turtles?
I guess the saying "ae ae bunis walata, ae ae kehelkang".. meaning special bananas for special buns, still applies.
